I would never had believed in the condition of manic-depression,Bi-polar as it is referred to now, had I not myself experienced it first hand. This true story is only a small experience, of what were so many, many moments of sorrow, guilt, all stemming from what would later be either the beginning of life for me or the beginning of death. The choice was mine.
Trying not to think about sex was not the problem- it came upon me like a hunger pain, and developed into a and sexual starvation, that no food, nor sleep, no amount of work, reading, or studying could cure. I would put it out of my eye gate, away from my ears, anything to not think about it- then when sleep did finally come to claim me for a little while- the dreams would begin. They would not have a direct theme, or point- yet came in the form of a lover usually only seen by a glimpse, and then develope into these incredible, overwhelming erotic sensations that made my clitoris so hard it hurt- my swollen labia so gorged with blood, I was sure they were going to explode.
Then I felt like I would begin to just come and come and come, and was always at the edge of this immense orgasm that I believed would have pushed me over into madness if I did not feel the fullness and fulfillment of its gigantic power! But I never did. I would then begin, again still into a level of consciousness really I cannot explain, where I would be masturbating so hard and fast to relieve this incredibly sensual torment, only to awaken in the realization of still hands upon my chest, and a grim familiarity of an orgasm unattained and a sexual stagnation, that felt more like a shovel digging my grave small spponfuls at a time.
The Black Cock had to come to my rescue, and I finally had to come to the realization that the only cure I had to this hellish existence was to find a Black King of the Earth, to dominate me, to suck my beautiful full C breasts till my utteris began contracting on its own, and securing my voluptuous body as his very own possession, fucking me so hard I feel my womb pulsating like the hard throbbing cock within,drilling and drilling, pounding and pounding till I could only writhe uncontrollably, pleading for him never to stop, tears of overwhelming release running down my face taking me where devils only dream- His Great and Mighty Dick rupturing my birth canal to make room for his Rod of PLeasure and Sin- I was in fucking heaven!
Then,as usual, showed up like a spurned lover- over and over again I was thrown back. Back into a world of despair and futility, realizing now that the choice was mine. And I sit, writing this story, awaiting more eagerly then a pauper for a piece of bread, knowing my Black Steed is out there somewhere. Waiting and Willing. And I will be ready,for that bountiful feast. Till then, my hunger pains -remain.
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